meri aatmakatha
charli chaiplina
charli chaiplin kee aatmakatha
-anuvad : sooraj prakasha
sata
1909 men main peris gaya. foliz berajere ne karno kampani ko ek mahine kee simit avadhi ke lie pradarshan karane ke lie anubandhit kiya tha. main doosare desh men jane ke khyal se hi kitana uttejit tha. yatra shuroo karane se pahale hamane ek saptah ke lie voolavich men pradarshan kiye. ye ek vahiyat shahar men bitaya gaya vahiyat aur sadan bhara saptah tha aur main parivartan kee rah dekh raha tha. hamen ravivar kee subah nikalana tha. mujhase gadi, bilkul chhootane vali hi thi. kisi tarah bhag kar mainne pletafarm se chhootati gadi pakadi. main saman vala aakhiri dibba hi pakad paya tha. un dinon mujhe gadiyan mis karane men maharat hasil thi.
chainal par tej dhoonaadhar barasat hone lagi. lekin kohare men lipate frans ko pahali najar se dekhana kabhi n bhoolane vala romanchak anubhav tha. ...ye ingalaind nahin hai. mujhe apane aapako bar-bar yad dilana pad raha tha. ye mahaddhip hai. frans. mainne apani kalpana men hamesha ise dekhane kee apil kee thi. mere pita aadhe french the. daraasal, chaiplin parivar moolat: frans se ingalaind men aaya tha. ve fransisi protaistent isaee hyoog nots ke vakt ingalaind kee dharati par utare the. pita ke chacha aksar garv se kaha karate ki ek fransisi janaral ne chaiplin parivar kee ingalaind shakha kee ninv rakhi thi.
ye dhalati sharad ritu ke din the. aur kailais se peris tak kee yatra bemaza thi. isake bavajood, jaise-jaise ham peris ke nikat pahunchate gaye, meri uttejana badhati chali gayi. ham andhere, akele ganvon se guzar kar ja rahe the. dhire-dhire dhoosar aasaman men hamane raushani ke darshan kiye.... vo hi hai peris ka pratibinb, gadi men hamare sath yatra kar rahe ek french aadami ne bataya.
peris men vah sab kuchh tha jisakee main ummid kar raha tha. gare doo nord se roo jyofre mari tak kee yatra ne mujhe uttejana aur adhairy se bhar diya. main har nukkad par utar kar paidal chalana chahata tha. is samay sham ke sat baj rahe the. kaife se aamantrit karati si sunahari battiyan chamak rahi thi. aur unake bahar saji mezen jivan ke aanand kee baten kar rahi thin. kuchhek karon ke naye aagaman ke alava ye abhi bhi maune, pisaro tatha renoir ka hi peris tha. ravivar ka din tha aur lag raha tha jaise har aadami utsav ke mood men hai. utsav aur ullas vahan kee fijan men the. yahan tak ki rooo jyofre mari men mera patthar kee divaron vala kamara jise main apani karagar kahata tha, mere utsah ko daba nahin paya kyonki sara vakt to main bisâ€tra aur kaife ke bahar lagi mezon par hi baitha rahata tha.
ravivar kee rat fri thi. isalie ham foliz berajere men sho dekh paye. hamen yahin par agale somavar se apana natak shuroo karana tha. mainne socha ki koee bhi thiyetar itane adhik glaimar ke sath, apani chamak-damak aur that-bat ke sath apane darpanon aur bade bade sfatik ke fanooson ke sath chamaka nahin tha. mote-mote kalin bichhe foyar men tatha dres sarkil men sari duniya maujood thi. badi-badi gulabi ratn jadit pagadiyan bandhe bharatiy yuvaraj, kalagi lage topon men french aur tarkee adhikari jo sharab gharon men koniyak kee chuskiyan lete nazar aa rahe the. bahar kee or bade foyar men sangit kee lahariyan baj rahi thin aur mahilaen apani poshakon ko aur apane far koton ko sahejati, sanbhalati ghoom rahi thin aur apane sangamaramari safed kandhon kee jhalak dikha rahi thin. ve aisi mahilaon ka sansar tha jinhen foyar men bane rahane aur dres sarkal men maujood rahane kee lat lagi huee thi aur ve chaturaee se vahan apani maujoodagi darj karatin aur chahakati firatin. ve un dinon vakaee khoobasoorat aur vinamr huaa karatin.
foliz berajere men vyavasayik dubhashiye bhi the jo apani topi par dubhashiya ka billa lagaye thiyetar ke foyar men ghoomate rahate. mainne unamen se pramukh dubhashiye se dosti kar li jo bahut sari bhashaen dhadalle se bol sakata tha.
sham ko apane pradarshan ke bad main apani stej kee sham vali poshak pahan leta aur maza marane valon kee bhid men shamil ho jata. unamen se mujhe ek aisi hasina mili jisane mera dil hi chhin liya. is tanvangi hasina kee gardan hansanuma thi aur usakee rangat safed thi. vo chhokari chharahari thi aur behad khoobasoorat thi. usakee sutavan nak aur lambi gahari barauniyan thin. usane kali makhamali poshak pahani huee thi aur hathon men safed dastane the. jab vah dres sarkal kee sidhiyan chadhane lagi to usane apana ek dastana gira diya. mainne lapak kar usaka dastana utha liya.
"..maf karana "usane kaha
"kash, aap ise ek bar fir giratin!" mainne badamashi se kaha.
"maf karana?"
tab mainne mahasoos kiya ki use angreji nahin aati aur mujhe french bolani nahin aati. isalie main bhaga-bhaga apane dubhashie dost ke pas gaya,"udhar ek bala kee khoobasoorat ladakee khadi hai jisane meri kamukata jagrit kar di hai. lekin vah khasi mahangi lag rahi hai."
usane kandhe uchakaye,"ek luis se jyada nahin,"
"tak to thik hai," mainne kaha, halanki un dinon ek luis bhi achchhi khasi rakam huaa karati thi. mainne socha, aur ye thi bhi.
mainne dubhashie se ek postakard kee doosari taraf kaee french abhivyaktiyan likhava kar rakh li thin jaise jab se mainne aapako dekha hai, main hosh kho baitha hoon. ityadi jinhen main aise pavitr maukon par istemal karane ka irada rakhata tha. mainne dubhashie se kaha ki vah shuruaati dhandhedari kee baten karava de aur usane hamare lie doot ka kam kiya. idhar se udhar sandeshon ka adan pradan karata raha. aakhir vah vapis aaya aur kahane laga,"sab kuchh tay ho gaya hai. ek luis men. lekin tumhen usake ghar tak jane aur vapis aane ka taiksi ka kiraya dena hoga."
main ek pal ke lie chakaraya,"vah rahati kahan hai?" mainne poochha.
"kiraye men das sent se jyada nahin lagenge."
das sents kee rakam dil dahala dene vali thi kyonki mainne is atirikt kharch kee ummid hi nahin kee thi. mainne majak men poochha,"kya vo paidal nahin chal sakati?"
"suno, ladakee aala darje kee chiz hai. sirf kiraye ke lie lafada mat karo." usane bataya.
main aakhir taiyar ho gaya.
jab sab kuchh tay kar liya gaya to main dres sarkal kee sidhiyon par usake pas se gujara. vah muskurayi aur mainne mud kar usakee taraf dekha...."aaj sham!"
"achchhi bat hai mahashaya"
choonki hamare pradarshan poora hone men taim tha, mainne usase vayada kiya ki ham pradarshan ke bad vahin milate hain. mere dost ne kaha,"tum taiksi mangana aur main tab tak ladakee lekar aaoonga, isase taim barabad nahin hoga."
"taim barabad?"
hamari gadi jab boleviyar de italiyans ke pas gujari to usake chehare par raushani aur chhaya ke chahabachche athakheliyan kar rahe the. mainne apane postakard par likhi french par udati si nigah dali aur usase kaha..."aap mujhe bahut achchhi lagi hain!"
vah apane safed chamakeele dant jhalakati huee hansi,"aap bahut achchhi french bol lete hain."
main bhavuk ho kar aage bolata raha," jab se mainne aapako dekha hai, main hosh kho baitha hoon."
vah fir hansi aur usane meri french sudhari...aur samajhaya ki main anaupacharik jaban ka istemal karoon aur use too ya tum kahoon. usane isake bare men socha aur fir hansi. tab usane apani ghadi kee taraf dekha. lekin ghadi band ho gayi thi. tab usane ishare se bataya ki vah samay janana chahati hai. aur bataya ki thik barah baje use ek bahut hi jaroori epaintament par jana hai.
"aaj sham to nahin," mainne jhijhakate hue javab diya.
"han aaj sham hi"
"lekin aap to aaj kee poori sham ke lie ingej hain mohatarama? poori rat ke lie"
vah achanak badahavas dikhane lagi,"oh, nahin, nahin, poori rat ke lie nahin."
isake bad vah jid pa aa gayi,"filahal ke lie bis frank!"
"ye kya hai?" usane jor de kar javab diya.
"aayam sauri," mainne kaha,"mera khyal hai ham taiksi yahin rukava den."
aur tab taiksi ko use faliz berajere men vapis chhod aane ka bhada de kar main taiksi se utar gaya. us samay mujhase jyada udas, aur mohabhang aadami kaun raha hoga.
hamen faliz berajere men das hafte tak pradarshan karane the kyonki ham bahut adhik safal ja rahe the lekin karno sahab kee doosari buking thi. mera vetan chh: paund prati saptah tha aur main isakee paee paee kharch kar raha tha. mere bhaee sidani ka ek kazin, jo usake pita kee or se usaka koee lagata tha, mere parichay men aaya. vah amirajada tha aur tathakathit uchch varg se nata rakhata tha. jin dinon vah peris men tha, usane mujhe khoob samay bhi diya aur ghumaya bhi. use bhi stej ke keede ne kata tha aur vah stej ka is had tak divana tha ki usane apani moonchhen tak mundava dalin taki vah hamari hi mandali ke kisi sadasy jaisa lag sake aur use baik stej men aane diya jaye.
durbhagy se use ingalaind laut jana pada, jahan mera khyal hai ki usake man bap ne usakee achchhi khasi sikaee kee aur use usake mahan mata pita ne dakshin afrika bhej diya.
peris men jane se pahale mainne suna tha ki haitti kee mandali bhi faliz berajere men hi pradarshan kar rahi hai, isalie mujhe poora yakeen tha ki usase vahan par mulakat ho jayegi. jis rat main vahan pahuncha to main baik stej men gaya aur usake bare men poochhatachh kee. lekin vahan par ek baile ladakee se mujhe pata chala ki unakee mandali ek hafta pahale hi masko ke lie ravana ho chukee hai. jis vakt main us ladakee se baten kar raha tha, sidhiyon se ek bahut hi rookhi aavaj sunayi di,"turant idhar aao, ajanabiyon se bat karane kee tumhari himmat kaise huee?" ye ladakee kee man thi. mainne samajhane kee koshish kee ki main to sirf apani ek mitr ke bare men janakari lena chah raha tha lekin man ne meri taraf koee dhyan nahin diya,"us aadami se bat karane kee koee zaroorat nahin hai. chalo ekadam andar aa jao."
main usakee is badatamiji par khasa khafa huaa. alabatta, bad men main usaka achchha parichit ban gaya. vah bhi usi hotal men hi rahati thi jisamen main ruka huaa tha. usakee do ladakiyan thin jo faliz berajere baile kee sadasyaen thi. unamen se chhoti vali terah baras kee thi aur mukhy adakara thi. vah sundar aur vidushi thi jabaki pandrah baras kee badi vali n to sundar thi aur n hi usamen akkal hi thi. man french thin bhare poore sharir kee malakin thin. unakee umr chalis baras ke aas pas thi. unhonne ek skotamain se shadi rachaee thi aur vah ingalaind men rahata tha. jab hamane faliz berajere men apane pradarshan shuroo kiye to ve mere pas aayin aur mafi mangane lagin ki ve itane behoode tarike se pesh aayi thin. ye ek bahut hi shanadar dostana sanbandh kee shuruaat thi. mujhe aksar unake kamare men chay ke lie bula liya jata. chay ve log bedaroom men hi banaya karati thin.
main ab jab pichhe mud kar dekhata hoon to main behad masoom tha. ek dopahar ko jab bachchiyan bahar gayi huee thin aur mama aur main akele the unaka vyavahar badal gaya aur jab ve chay chhan rahi thin to unaka badan kanpane laga. main us vakt apane sapanon aur apani ummidon kee bat kar raha tha, apane pyar aur apani nirashaon kee bat kar raha tha, aur ve behad bhavuk ho gayin. jab main mej par apani chay ka pyala rakhane ke lie utha to ve mere pas aayin ... tum kitane achchhe ho. unhonne kaha aur apane hathon men mera chehara bharate hue meri aankhon men gahare dekhate hue kaha...tum itane pyare bachche ho ki tumhara dil nahin toda jana chahiye. unakee nigahen jhukati hoti chalin gayin. ajib tarah se aur mantrabiddh ho gayin aur unakee aavaz kanpane lagi...tumhen pata hai, main tumhen apane bachche kee tarah pyar karati hoon. unhonne kaha aur ab bhi apane hathon men mera chehara bhare hue thin. tab haule se unaka chehara mere chehare ke pas aaya aur unhonne mujhe choom liya.
"thaink yoo," mainne vinamrata poorvak kaha aur bholepan se unhen choom liya. ve apani bedhati aankhon se mujhe bandhe rahin aur unake honth kanpate rahe. aur unakee aankhon men panili chamak aa gayi. tabhi achanak apane aapako sanbhalate hue ve ek kap chay aur dhalane ke lie chali gayin aur pal bhar men unaka bat karane ka tarika badal gaya aur madhur hansi se aur hasy bodh se unaka chehara damakane laga," tum bahut hi pyare ladake ho...main tumhen bahut pasand karati hoon."
unhonne apani ladakiyon ke bare men mujhe kaee rahasy bataye,"chhoti vali bahut achchhi ladakee hai." unhonne bataya,"lekin badi vali par nigah rakhane kee jaroorat hoti hai. vah samasya banati ja rahi hai."
sho ke bad ve mujhe apane bade vale bedaroom men khane ke lie aamantrit karatin. is bedaroom men ve aur unakee chhoti vali ladakee soya karate the. apane kamare men lautane se pahale main unhen aur chhoti vali ko gud nait kis karata. usake bad mujhe ek chhote vale kamare se guzar kar jana padata jahan par badi vali soti thi. ek rat jab main us kamare se ho kar guzar raha tha to vah ekadam mere pas aa gayi aur fusafusa kar boli,"rat ko apane kamare ka daravaja khula rakhana. jab parivar so jayega to main tumhare kamare men aaoongi." mera yakeen karen ya n karen, mainne use hikarat se usake bistar par dhakela aur lapak kar kamare se bahar aaya. falis berajere men unake antim pradarshan ke bad mainne suna tha ki unakee badi vali ladakee, jo mushkil se pandrah baras kee huee thi, sath baras ke ek mote se jarman dog trenar ke sath bhag gayi thi.
lekin main utana bhola nahin tha jitana dikhata tha. apani mandali ke sathiyon ke sath raton men aksar main veshyalayon ke chakkar katata aur vahan ve sab harakaten karata jo javan log karate hain. ek rat, kaee paig chadha lene ke bad, main eni ston nam ke ek bhootapoorv lait haivi vet eenami faitar ke sath bhid gaya. ye lafada restaran men shuroo huaa. aur jab vetaron ne tatha pulis ne hamen alag kiya to vah bola,"main tumhen hotal men dekh loonga." ham donon ek hi hotal men thahare hue the. usaka kamara mere kamare ke oopar tha. subah char baje main jab apane hotal men lauta to mainne usaka daravaja khatakhataya.
"aa jao," vah jaldi se bola," aur apane joote utar do taki koee shor sharaba n ho."
jaldi hi ham chhati tak nange ho gaye aur ek doosare ke samane aa gaye. ham kafi der tak ek doosare ko hit karate rahe aur ek doosare ke var bhi bachate rahe. isi men mano sadiyan lag gayin. kaee bar usane sidhe hi meri thuddi par var kiya, lekin koee asar nahin huaa. "mainne socha, tum panch maroge," main tana mara. usane ek chhalang lagaee lekin usaka var khali gaya. aur usaka sir divar se ja takaraya. vah apane aap hi past ho chala tha. mainne use khatm karane kee sochi, lekin mere panch kamajor the. use khataranak dhang se hit kar sakata tha, lekin mere panch ke pichhe jor nahin tha. achanak usane jor se mere munh par ek zor ka ghoonsa mara, jisase mere aage ke dant hil gaye, aur isase mera tan badan gusse ke mare jalane laga."...bahut ho gaya," mainne kaha,"main apane dant nahin ganvana chahata." vah mere oopar aaya aur mujhase lipat gaya. aur tab shishe men dekhane laga. mainne usaka chehara kutar kar chhalani kar diya tha. mere hath itane sooj gaye the manon dastane pahan rakhe hon. chhat par, divaron par aur paradon par khoon ke dag nazar aa rahe the. main nahin janata, khoon sab jagah kaise pahunch gaya tha.
rat ko khoon mere munh ke pas se sarakata huaa mere garadan tak aa pahuncha tha. subah ke vakt jo nanha chhokara jo mere lie chay ka pyala le kar aata tha, ye dekh kar chillaya. usane socha ki mainne aatmahatya kar li hai. aur usake bad mainne kisi se jhagada nahin kiya.
ek rat dubhashiya mere pas aaya aur bola ki ek prasiddh sangitakar mujhase milana chahata hai, aur kya main usase boks men jana chahoonga?
aamantran rochak tha kyonki unake sath vahan par ek bahut hi khoobasoorat, bhavy mahila baithi huee thin jo roosi baile kee sadasya thi. dubhashiye ne mera parichay karaya. un mahanubhav ne kaha ki ve mera kam dekh kar bahut khush hue hain aur janana chahate hain ki meri umr kya hai. in tarif bhare shabdon ko sun kar main sammanapoorvak jhuka aur bich-bich men main chor nigahon se unakee mitr ko bhi kanakhiyon se dekh leta tha,"aap janmajat ek sangitakar aur nartak hain."
yah mahasoos karate hue ki is tarif ke badale shabd koee mayane nahin rakhate aur javab men sirf muskuraya hi ja sakata hai, mainne dubhashiye kee taraf dekha aur jhuka. sangitakar mahoday uthe aur mujhase hath milaya, tab main bhi khada ho gaya," han," unhonne mera hath hilate hue kaha,"aap ek sachche kalakar hain."
jab ve log chale gaye to main dubhashiye se poochha,"unake sath vah mahila kaun thi?"
"ve ek roosi baile dansar hai mis...." yah ek bahut hi lamba aur mushkil nam tha. "aur is mahashay ka kya nam tha?" mainne poochha.
"debusi," usane javab diya,"ve ek vikhyat kampojar hain."
"mainne to unaka nam kabhi nahin suna," mainne tippani kee.
ye baras maidam stenahail ke kukhyat skaindal aur mukadamebaji ka baras tha. un par mukadama chala tha aur unhen apane pati kee hatya ko doshi nahin paya gaya tha. ye baras sanasanikhej "pom pom dansa" ka tha jisamen jode kamukata ka pradarshan karate hue ashobhaniy tarike se gol gol ghoom kar nrity karate the. ye baras vyaktigat aay par prati paund par lagaye gaye chh: pens ke avishvasaniy dimag kharab karane vale kar ka tha. isi baras debusi ne ingalaind men apana french natak prastut kiya jise janata ne nakar diya aur darshak hol se bahar nikal gaye.
bhari man ke sath main ingalaind lauta aur pradeshon ke daure par nikal gaya. ye peris ke kitana viparit tha. uttari shaharon men ve manahoosayit bhari ravivar kee shamen. sab kuchh band, aur sab kuchh yad dilasi vah udasi bhi jo kamatur yuvakon aur paturiyon ke sath-sath chalati. ye andhiyari haee strit men aur pichhavade kee galiyon men gasht lagate ghoomate rahate. ravivaron kee shamon ko yahi unaka taim pas hota tha.
ingalaind men mujhe vapis aaye chh: mah bit chuke the aur main apane samany rootin ka aadi ho chala tha. aur tabhi landan karyalay se ek aisi khabar aayi jisane mujhe romanch se bhar diya. mistar karno ne khabar di ki da' futabal maich ke doosare daur men mujhe mistar heri vaildan kee jagah leni hai. ab mujhe mahasoos huaa ki ab mere sitare bulandi par hain. ab patte mere hath men the. halanki main apani ripetari men maming bardas aur doosare natakon men safalata ke jhande gad chuka tha, ve sari chijen d futabal maich men mukhy bhoomika nibhane ke samane kuchh bhi nahin thin. aur sabase badi bat to ye thi ki hamen aoksaford se shuruaat karani thi. ye landan ka sabase mahattvapoorn sangit hol tha. ham sabase bada aakarshan hone ja rahe the. aur ye pahali bar hone ja raha tha ki postaron men aur vigyapanon aadi men mera nam sabase oopar jata. ye bahut oonchi chhalang thi. agar main aoksaford men safal ho jata to isase main ek naya nam banata aur main tab is sthiti men hota ki aur adhik pagar kee mang kar sakata tha aur ek din aisa bhi aa sakata tha ki main apane khud ke skaich likhata. daraasal, isase har tarah kee shanadar yojanaon ke dvar khulate the. choonki kamobesh usi kast ko hi da' futabal maich ke lie rakha ja raha tha, isalie hamen sirf ek hi hafte kee riharsal kee zaroorat thi. mainne is bare men bahut jyada socha ki main natak men apani bhoomika kaise nibhaoonga. hairi veldan lankashayar uchcharan men bolate the, mainne tay kiya ki main ise kokane shaili men karoonga.
lekin pahali hi riharsal men mujhe svar yantr kee gadabadi ka daura pad gaya. mainne apani aavaz ko bachane ke lie sab kuchh karake dekh dala, fusafusa kar bat kee, bhap ko apane bhitar liya, gale par spre kiya, aur tab tak laga raha jab tak chinta ne mujhase meri komalata aur sari komedi chhin li.
natak kee pahali rat mere gale kee nas-nas tani huee rassi kee mafik khinchi huee thi. lekin meri aavaz suni nahin ja sakee. karno bad men mere aas-pas mandarate rahe. unake chehare par nirasha aur hikarat ke mile jule bhav the,"koee bhi to tumhari aavaz nahin sun saka." ve jhidakate hue bole, lekin mainne unhen aashvast kiya ki agali rat meri aavaz zaroor behatar ho jayegi. lekin agali rat bhi vahi hal raha. sach to ye hai ki agali rat vah aur kharab ho chukee thi. isaka karan ye tha ki mainne aavaz ke sath itani jor aajamaish kar li thi ki mujhe khatara lagane laga ki kahin meri aavaz poori tarah se chali hi n jaye. agali rat meri bhi mera yahi hal raha. natija yah huaa ki pahale hafte ke bad hi pradarshanon ka parda gir gaya. aoksaford men pradarshan ke mere sare sapane choor choor ho chuke the aur meri nirasha ka yah aalam tha ki main enfloonja ka marij ho kar bistar par pad gaya.
haitti se mile mujhe ek baras se jyada ho gaya tha. floo ke prakop ke bad kamazori aur udasi ke aalam men mujhe ek bar fir usaka khyal aaya aur main ek rat der ko kaimbaravail men usake ghar kee taraf ghoomata-ghamata pahunch gaya. lekin ghar khali tha aur daravaje par `kiraye ke lie khali' ka bord lataka huaa tha. main bina kisi khas makasad ke galiyon men bhatakata raha. achanak rat ke andhere men se ek aakriti ubhari, sadak par karate hue aur meri taraf aate hue.
"charli, aadhi rat ko tum yahan kya kar rahe ho?" ye haitti thi. usane kala sil kee khal vala kot pahana huaa tha aur sil kee khal ka hi gol hait pahana huaa tha.
"main tumase milane aaya tha,' mainne mazak men kaha.
vah muskurayi,"bahut kamazor ho gaye ho tum?"
mainne use bataya ki main abhi hi floo se utha hoon. vah ab satrah baras kee ho rahi thi aur khasi sundar nazar aa rahi thi aur usane kapade bhi kafi salike se pahane hue the.
"lekin saval ye hai ki tum is vakt yahan kya kar rahi ho?" poochha mainne.
"main apani ek saheli se milane aayi thi aur ab apane bhaee ke ghar ja rahi hoon. aana chahoge tum mere sath?" usane javab diya.
raste men usane bataya ki usakee bahan ne ek amarikee karodapati fraink se shadi kar li hai aur ve nais men rah rahe hain. vah subah landan chhod kar unase milane ke lie ja rahi hai.
us rat men use thaga-sa khada dekhata aur vah apane bhaee ke sath ithala-ithalakar nachati rahi. vah apane bhaee ke sath moorkhatapoorn aur thagini kee tarah ekting kar rahi thi. aur main, apane aap ke bavajood, is bhavana se apane aapako mukt nahin kar pa raha tha ki meri justajoo usake lie zara si bhi kam nahin huee thi. agar vah kisi sadharan jagah se talluk rakhati hoti? kisi bhi aur samany ladakee kee tarah? is khyal ne mujhe udas kar diya aur main usakee taraf vastuparak nigahon se dekhata rah gaya.
usake sharir men bharav aa gaya tha aur mainne usakee chhatiyon ke ubharon kee taraf dekha aur paya ki unakee golaiyan chhoti thin aur bahut jyada aakarshak nahin thi. agar meri haisiyat huee to kya main usase shadi kar paoonga? nahin, main kisi se bhi shadi nahin karana chahata tha.
us thandi aur chamakeeli rat ko main jab usake sath ghar kee taraf aa raha tha to main zaroor hi bahut adhik udas tarike se tatasth raha hooonga kyonki mainne usase is bat kee aasha vyakt kee ki usaka jivan bahut sukhi aur shanadar hoga.
"tum itane udas aur toote lag rahe the ki main ekadam rone rone ko thi." usane kaha tha.
us rat main ek vijeta kee tarah ghar lauta kyonki mainne use apani udasi se chhoo liya tha aur apane vyaktitv ko mahasoos kara diya tha.
karno ne mujhe fir se maming bardas men rakh liya tha aur vidanbana ye ki meri aavaz ko poori tarah se thik hone men ek mahina lag gaya tha. da' futabal maich ke bare men meri jo nirasha thi, mainne tay kiya ki ab use havi nahin hone doonga. lekin ek khyal bhi mujhe sataye ja raha tha ki shayad main vaildan kee barabari karane ya unakee jagah lene ke kabil nahin tha. aur isase sabake pichhe forestar thiyetar men meri asafalata hi kam kar rahi thi. ab tak choonki mera aatm vishvas poori tarah se lauta nahin tha, jis bhi naye natak men mainne mukhy bhoomika nibhayi, vah dar ka ek trayal tha. aur ab sabase adhik chaunkane vala aur atyadhik nirnayak din aa gaya jab mainne mistar karno ko bataya ki mera karar khatm hone ko hai aur mujhe vetan men badhotari chahiye.
karno jise bhi pasand nahin karate the usake prati kroor aur sanakee ho sakate the. choonki ve mujhe pasand karate the isalie mainne unake vyaktitv ke is paksh ke darshan nahin kiye the lekin ve sachamuch bahut hi badatamizi bhare tarike se choor-choor kar sakate the. apane kisi kamediyan ke pradarshan ke dauran agar unhen vah kamediyan pasand nahin aata tha to ve vings men khade ho kar itane zor se nak sinakane ka natak karate the ki sabako sunayi de jaye. ve aksar aisa karane lagate the ki kamediyan manch chhod kar hi aa jata tha aur usake sath hatha-paee karane lagata tha. vah aakhiri bar thi jab unhonne is tarah kee harakat kee thi aur ab main unake pas vetan men badhotari ke lie bhidane ja raha tha.
"thik hai," unhonne rookhepan ke sath muskurate hue kaha, "tum vetan men vriddhi chahate ho aur thiyetar sarkit usamen katauti karana chahata hai." unhonne kandhe uchakaye,"aoksaford myoozik hal ke hangame ke bad hamare pas sirf shikayaten hi shikayaten hain. unaka kahana hai ki kampani us layak nahin hai... do kaudi ka kraich krauda§
karno kee mandali men hamen kam se kam se chh: mahine lagate the ki ham parafaikt taimpo vikasit kar pate aur tab tak use kraich kraud ke nam se pukara jata tha.
"lekin usake lie mujhe hi to doshi nahin thahara sakate," mainne javab diya.
"lekin ve to doshi thaharate hain." unaka javab tha. ve chubhati nigahon se meri taraf ghoor rahe the.
"unhen kya shikayat hai?" poochha mainne.
unhonne apana gala khakhara aur farsh par dekhane lage,"unaka kahana hai ki tum saksham nahin ho."
halanki unakee yah tippani sidhe mere pet men ja kar shool kee tarah chubhi, isase mujhe gussa bhi aaya, lekin mainne shant svar men javab diya,"thik hai, doosare log aisa nahin sochate. aur ve mujhe usase jyada dene ko taiyar hain jitana mujhe yahan mil raha hai." ye sach nahin tha. mere samane koee prastav nahin tha.
"unaka kahana hai ki sho falatoo hai aur kamediyan do kaudi ka hai. dekho," unhonne fon uthate hue kaha,"main ek star ko fon karoonga, beramandase ko, aur tum unase apane aap sun lena.... mera khyal hai pichhale hafte tumhara sho bahut hi kharab raha tha." unhonne fon par bat kee.
"vahiyat..." fon par aavaj aayi.
karno ne khinsen nipori,"aap ise kis shreni men dalenge?"
"do kauda ka...sho"
"aur chaiplin ke bare men kya khyal hai? hamare pradhan kamediyan? kya usaka kam bhi thik nahin?"
"vah to boo marata hai."
karno sahab ne fon mujhe thama diya,"apane aap hi sun lo..."
main fon liya. "...ho sakata hai vah boo marata ho lekin usase aadha bhi nahin jitana aapaka sadandh bhara thiyatar boo marata hai." mainne javab diya.
karno sahab kee mujhe aukat dikhane kee tarakeeb kam nahin aayi. mainne unase kaha ki agar ve bhi mere bare men yahi ray rakhate hain to karar ka navikaran karane ka koee matalab nahin hai. kaee mayanon men karno bahut hi kaiyan aadami the. lekin ve manovaigyanik nahin the. beshak main boo marata tha to bhi ye karno sahab ko shobha nahin deta tha ki fon kee doosari taraf se kisi aur se ye kahalavayen. mujhe panch paund mil rahe the aur halanki mera aatm vishvas dagamaya huaa tha, fir bhi main chh: kee mang kar raha tha. meri hairani ka thikana nahin raha jab karno sahab ne mujhe chh: paund dena svikar kar liya aur main ek bar unakee nigahon men raj dulara ban gaya.
aalf rivz, jo karno sahab kee amerikee kampani men mainejar the, ingalaind vapis aaye aur unhonne ye afavah faila di ki ve apane sath amerika le jane ke lie kisi pradhan kamediyan kee talash men hain.
aoksaford myoojik hol ke us bade hadase ke bad se main amerika jane ke khyalon se bhara huaa tha. akele ja kar thril aur romanch ke lie nahin, balki vahan jane ka matalab hamesha nayi aashaen aur nayi duniya men ek nayi shuruaat. saubhagy se, main jis naye natak sketing men pramukh bhoomika nibha raha tha, baramingham men safalata ke jhande gad raha tha, aur jab mistar rivz vahan aa kar kampani men shamil hue to mainne apani bhoomika ko behatar banane men jan lada di aur isaka natija ye huaa ki rivz sahab ne karno sahab ko tar bheja ki unhen amerika ke lie apana kamediyan mil gaya hai. lekin karno sahab ne mere lie aur hi mansoobe bandhe hue the. is vahiyat khabar ne mujhe hafton tak pesopesh men dale rakha jab tak ki ve vov vov nam ke natak men dilachaspi nahin lene lag gaye. ye natak sikret sosaiti men kisi sadasy ko liye jane ke bare men prahasan tha. mujhe aur rivz sahab ko ye natak vahiyat laga, bina sir pair ka, bina kisi khasiyat ke laga, lekin karno sahab par isaka nasha savar tha aur ve ad gaye ki amerika sikret sosaitiyon se bhara pada hai. aur un par is tarah ka kataksh karane vala natak zaroor safal hoga. meri khushi aur rahat ka thikana n raha jab karno sahab ne mujhe hi isakee pradhan bhoomika ke lie chuna. amerika ke lie vov vov.
mujhe amerika jane ke lie isi tarah ke kisi mauke kee jaroorat thi. ingalaind men mujhe lag raha tha ki main apani sanbhavanaon ke shikhar par pahunch chuka hoon aur isake alava, vahan par mere avasar ab bandhe bandhaye rah gaye the. aadhi-adhoori padhaee ke chalate agar main myoojik hol ke kamediyan ke roop men fel ho jata to mere pas majadoori ke kam karane ke bhi bahut hi simit aasar hote.
amerika men sanbhavanaon ka annat aakash tha.
yatra shuroo karane se pahale kee rat main landan ke vest end men ghoomata raha, lisetar skvayar, koventari strit, d mal, aur pikadilli men ruka. us samay mere man men udasi bhari bhavana thi ki ye aakhiri bar hoga ki main landan ghoom raha hoon kyonki main man hi man tay kar chuka tha ki mujhe sthayi roop se amerika jakar hi basana hai. main aadhi rat tak do baje tak bhatakata raha, sunasan galiyon aur meri khud kee udasi kee kavita men doobata utarata.
main vida ke do shabd kahane se bach raha tha. apane natedaron se aur doston se bichhudate samay aadami jo kuchh bhi mahasoos karata hai, unake dvara vidaee diye jane ke bare men, usamen aur dhansata hi hai. main subah chh: baje hi uth gaya tha. isalie mainne is bat kee zaroorat nahin samajhee ki sidani ko jagaoon. lekin mainne mej par ek parchi chhod di,"amerika ja raha hoon. tumhen likhata rahoonga. pyar. charli."
………
aatha
hamen yatra karate hue barah din ho chuke the, aur hamara agala padav kyoobek tha. behad kharab mausam aur charon taraf laharata huaa mahasamudr. tin din tak to ham tooti patavar lekar pade rahe, isake bavazood main to ek doosari hi duniya men jane ke vichar se ullasit tha aur apane aapako bahut halka mahasoos kar raha tha. maveshiyon vali nav par ham kanada ho kar ja rahe the. nav par gay, bail, bhed, bakari bhale hi n hon, par choohe dher sare the aur rah-rah kar ve badi hekadi se meri barth par aa dhamakate aur joota chalane par hi bhagate.
sitanbar kee shuruaat thi aur nyoo faundalaind hamane kohare men par kiya. aakhir mukhy bhoomi ke darshan hue. fuhar pad rahi thi aur din men bhi sent lanres nadi ke tat nirjan nazar aa rahe the. nav se kyoobek us chaharadivari kee tarah lag raha tha jahan haimalet ka bhoot chala karata hoga. mera man stets ke bare men kutoohal se bhar utha.
par jaise-jaise ham toranto kee or badhate gae, patajhad ke rangon se desh aur khoobasoorat hota chala gaya aur meri ummiden pahale se jyada rangin ho uthin.
toranto men hamane gadi badali aur amerikee aapravasan ke daftar se hokar guzare. aakhirakar ravivar subah das baje ham nyooyark aa pahunche. taims skvayar men jab ham taiksi se utare to kuchh nirasha si huee. sadakon aur futapathon par akhabar idhar-udhar ud rahe the. brodave beraunak dikh raha tha, mano foohad-si koee aurat abhi-abhi bistar se utari ho. pray: harek nukkad par oonchi oonchi kursiyan thin jisamen jooton ke sanche lage the aur log bina kot vagairah ke, keval kamiz pahane hue aaram se baith kar apane joote polish karava rahe the. dekh kar laga, mano ve log sadak par hi shauch aadi se nivritt hue hon. kaee log ajanabiyon sarikhe lage jo futapathon par yoon hi khade the mano abhi-abhi relave steshan se bahar nikale hon aur agali gadi ke aane tak ka samay kat rahe hon.
jo bhi ho, ye nyoo yark tha, romanchak, akkal chakara dene vala aur kuchh-kuchh daravana. doosari taraf peris jyada dostana tha. main french bhale hi nahin bol pata tha par bistas aur kaife vale peris ne harek nukkad par mera svagat kiya tha. lekin nyoo yark bade karobar kee jagah thi. garv se bhari nishthur, oonchi-oonchi aakash ko chhoone vali imaraton ko aam aadami kee takalif se koee sarokar nahin tha. sailoon bar men bhi grahakon ke baithane kee koee jagah nahin thi. sirf pital kee lambi reling lagi huee thi jis par aap pair tika saken, aur khane kee nami jagahen, beshak saf-suthari thi, safed sangamaramar lage hue the vahan lekin ye jagahen bhi mujhe bejan aur aspatalanuma lagin.
forti-thard strit se kuchh door braun ston hauses men mainne pichhavade ka ek kamara liya, jahan ab purani taims bilding khadi hai. ghar bada hi manahoos aur ganda tha aur ise dekh kar mujhe landan aur apane chhote se flait kee yad satane lagi. besament men dhulaee aur istari ka karobar chalata tha aur hafte ke dinon men bhap ke sath oopar udakar aati istari hote kapadon kee boo meri pareshaniyon ko aur badhati.
us pahale din mainne apane aapako bahut hi adhoora paya. kisi restaran men jana aur kuchh aordar karana to agni pariksha thi kyonki mera angrezi uchcharan unase alag tha aur main dhire-dhire bolata tha. kaee log itane farrate se aur jhataka dekar bolate the ki mujhe is dar se asuvidha hone lagati ki main bolane chala to hakalane lagoonga aur unaka bhi samay barabad hoga.
ye chamak-damak aur ye raftar mere lie naee thi. nyoo york men chhote se chhote karobar vala aadami bhi furti se kam karata hai. joota polish karane vala ladaka polish vale kapade ko furti se jhatakata hai, bar men biyar dene vala hi vaisi hi furti se bar kee chamachamati satah par biyar aapakee or saraka dega. ande kee jardi mile malt dete vakt soda klark kisi koodate fandate kalabaj kee tarah kam karata hai. ek hi bar men vah ek gilas jhatakata hai aur jo bhi chizen dalani hain, un par toot padata hai. vanila flevar, aaisakrim ka chhota-sa tukada, do chammach malt, kachcha anda, bas ek bar men fod dala, doodh milaya, fir in sabako lekar ek bartan men zor se hila kar milaya aur lijie pesh hai. ye sab kuchh ek minat se bhi kam samay men.
evenyoo par us pahale din kaee log vaise nazar aae jaisa main mahasoos kar raha tha - akele aur kate-fate. inamen se kuchh aise hav-bhav men the jaise vahi us jagah ke malik hon. kaee to bade dhith aur badamijaj the mano sajjanata aur vinamrata se pesh aaenge to koee unhen kamazor samajh lega. lekin sham ko garmiyon ke kapade pahani huee bhid ke sath jab main brodave hokar ja raha tha to jo dekha usase mera man aashvast ho gaya. kadake kee sitanbar ke thand ke bich hamane ingalaind chhoda tha aur jhulasa dene vali assi digri kee garmi men nyoo yark pahunche the. abhi main chal hi raha tha ki bijali kee dher sari rang-birangi battiyon se brodave jagamagane laga aur beshakeemati javaharat kee tarah chamakane laga. garmi kee us rat men mera nazariya badala aur amerika ka naya matalab mere zehan men utarata chala gaya. bahumanzila imaraton, chamakati khushanuma roshaniyon aur gudaguda dene vale vigyapanon ne mere man men aasha aur romanch kee halachal macha di. yahi hai - mainne apane aapase kaha - main isi jagah se vasta rakhata hoon.
brodave par lagata tha har koee kisi n kisi karobar men hai: abhineta, hasy kalakar, majame vale, sarakas men kam karane vale aur manoranjan vale har jagah the. sadak par, restaraon men, hotalon aur dipartamental storon men har aadami dhandhe kee bat kar raha tha. thietar malikon ke nam jahan-tahan sunane ko mil jate: li shubart, martin baik, viliyam moris, parsi viliyams, kla end iralaingar, froimain, sulivan end kansidain, paintejez. ghareloo naukarani ho, lift vala ho, vetar ho, taiksivala ho, baramain ho, doodh vala ho ya bekari vala, jise dekho, sho main kee tarah bat karata. rah chalate logon kee batachit ke sunayi padate ansh bhi vahi. boodhi ho chali mataen, dikhane men kisanon kee biviyon kee tarah aur baten sunie to - vah abhi-abhi vest men paintezej ke lie kam karake lauta hai. ek din men tin-tin sho the. sab kuchh thik-thak raha to bada hasy kalakar banega.
ek daraban kah raha hai,"tumane vintar gardan men jonasan ko dekha?"
"jaroor, usane jek ke sho kee laj rakh li."
akhabaron ka ek poora panna har din thietar ko samarpit hota tha jisamen resakors vale ghodon ke resing chart kee manind khabaren hotin. hasy kala men kisane kitana nam kamaya, kis par adhik taliyan bajin, isake aadhar par res ke ghodon kee tarah pahale, doosare aur tisare sthan die jate the. abhi is daud men ham shamil nahin hue the aur mujhe is bat kee chinta rahati ki chart men ham kis pojishan par aaenge. 56 hafton tak hamara karyakram parsi viliyams sarkit men tha. isake bad aur koee buking nahin thi. hamara amerika men tikana isi karyakram ke parinam par nirbhar tha. nahin chale, to ingalaind laut jaenge.
ham logon ne ek riharsal room liya aur da' vau vauz kee ek hafte tak riharsal kee. hamare dal men drari len ka prasiddh boodha sanakee jokar vakar tha. sattar par kar chuka tha. aavaz to badi ganbhir thi par riharsal men pata chala ki saf-saf to bol hi nahin pata. oopar se plot ka ek bada hissa darshakon ko samajhane ka kam usi ko karana tha. aisi koee lain jaise - mazak behantaha daravana hoga usase bola hi n jae aur vah kabhi bol paya bhi nahin. pahali rat vah eblib-eblib badabadaya. bad men yah eblib hi rah gaya, par aakhir tak sahi shabd nahin hi nikala.
amerika men karno ka bada nam tha. isalie behatarin kalakaron ke karyakram men sabase jyada aakarshan ka kendr ham hi hote the. bhale hi mujhe us skech se nafarat thi, mainne isaka bharapoor upayog kiya. mujhe ummid thi ki shayad yahi vo chiz ho jaye jise karno khalis amerika ke lie kaha karate the.
pahali rat stej par aane se pahale main kitana narvas tha, kis takalik aur pasopesh men tha, main isaka bayan nahin kar sakata aur n hi isaka ki stej ke said men khade amerikee kalakar hamen dekh rahe the to mujh par kya bit rahi thi. ingalaind men mere pahale latife par zoradar thahake lagate the aur isase pata chal jata tha ki bakee kee komedi kaisi chalegi.
kainp ka sin tha, ek tanboo men chay ka kap lie main pravesh karata hoon.
aarchi (main) : gud marning hadasan. mujhe thoda-sa pani chahie. denge ?
hadasan : jaroor, par kisalie
aarchi : main nahana chahata hoon.
(darshakon kee or se ek halkee aadhi-adhoori hansi aur fir berukhi chuppi)
hadasan : rat kee nind kaisi rahi, aarchi?
aarchi : are, mat poochho. sapane men dekha, ek illi mujhe dauda rahi hai.
ab bhi darshakon men vaisi hi murdanagi. is tarah ham badabadate rahe aur stej ke bagal men khade amerikiyon ke thobade aur jyada latakate gae. lekin hamare us ank ko khatm karane se pahale hi ve ja chuke the.
ye skech bachakana aur niras tha, aur mainne karno ko salah di thi ki isase shuruaat n karen. hamare pas doosare jyada mazedar skechej the jaise sketing, d daindi thivs, d post aofis aur mistar parkins, em.pi. jo amerikee darshakon ko pasand aate. lekin karno apani zid par ade rahe.
jo bhi kahie, parades men nakami se takalif to hoti hi hai. har rat aise darshakon ke samane haaajiri bajana vakaee dushkar kam tha jo ek ke bad ek gudaguda dene vali ingalish komedi ke aage berukhi se sannata odhe baithe rahen. stej par hamara aana-jana sharanarthiyon kee tarah hota tha. ye beizazati ham logon ne chhah hafte tak jheli. doosare kalakar ham logon se yoon alag-thalag rahate the jaise hamen pleg huaa ho. is tarah se patakani khane aur zalil hone ke bad jab ham jane ke lie stej ke pas khade hue to laga mano lain men khada karake ham goli mari jani hai.
halanki main apane aapako akela aur thukaraya huaa mahasoos karata tha, fir bhi is bat ke lie shukragujar tha ki main akela rah raha hoon. kam se kam doosaron ke sath apani beizazati sheyar to nahin karani padati thi. din men main lanbi antahin vithiyon par chahalakadami kiya karata tha. kabhi chidiya ghar, to kabhi park, machhalighar aur kabhi sangrahalay jakar man bahala leta tha. apani nakami ke bad nyoo yark ab ekadam aparajey lagata tha. imaraten itani oonchi jahan pahuncha n ja sake aur unaka pratispardhi parivesh itana dabane vala ki jisake aage aap khade nahin ho sakate. isakee shanadar oonchi imaraten aur faishanabel dukanen berahami se mujhe mere adhoorepan ka ahasas karati thin. fifth evenyoo ke pare aalishan makan safalata ke smarak the, ghar nahin.
main paidal chal kar shahar bhar kee dhool fankata rahata aur shahar se hote hue jhopad patti vale ilakon kee or chala jata. medisan skvayar ke park se hokar, jahan lavaris boodhe apane pairon kee taraf bhav shoonyata se ghoorate hue hatasha men bench par baithe rahate the. isake bad main sekand aur thard evenyoo kee or chala. garibi yahan beraham, tikhi aur marak thi. jahan-tahan pasari huee, ek gurrati, atthahas karati aur chillati huee garibi; daravajon par, chimaniyon par failati huee aur raston par vaman karati huee garibi. mera dil baithane laga aur mera man jald se jald brodave lautane ka karane laga.
amerikee aadami aashavadi hota hai. athak cheshta karane vala aur saikadon sapanon men dooba rahane vala. vah jald se jald baji mar lena chahata hai. vah jaik pot hit karo! nikal chalo! bech dalo!. kamao aur bhago! koee doosara dhandha kar lo! men vishvas karata hai. lekin had se guzar jane ke isi andaz ne meri himmat bandhani shuroo kar di. doosari or se dekha jaye to apani nakamiyon ke chalate main kafi halka mahasoos karane laga. aisa lagane laga mano ab koee rukavat nahin hai. amerika men aur bhi kaee sanbhavanaen thin. main thietar kee duniya se kyoon chipaka rahoon? main kala ko samarpit to tha nahin. koee doosara dhandha kar leta. mujhamen aatm vishvas lautane laga. jo ho gaya so ho gaya, mainne amerika men tikane kee than li thi.
asafalata se dhyan hatane ke lie mainne socha, kuchh padhoon aur apana shaikshik star uthaoon. mainne purani kitabon kee dukanon ke chakkar lagane shuroo kie. kaee pathy pustaken kharid dalin - kelogs retarik, ek angreji vyakaran aur ek laitin angreji dikshanari - aur unhen padhane kee thani. lekin mera sankalp dhara ka dhara rah gaya. kitabon ko dekhate hi mainne unhen apane sandook men ekadam niche rakh diya aur bhool gaya - aur stets men doosari bar aane par hi unakee or dekha.
nyoo yark men pahale hafte ke karyakram men ek natak tha, gas edavards skool dej. bachchon ko lekar banaya gaya. is mandali men ek aakarshak charitr tha jo dikhane men chhota tha, par chal-dhal aur taur-tarikon se pahunchi huee chij lagata tha. use sigaret ke koopanon se jooe kee lat thi jisake badale men yunaited sigar stor se nikal pleted kofi ke baratanon se lekar shanadar piyano tak milane ka chans rahata tha. unake lie vah kisi ke bhi sath pansa fenkane ko taiyar tha. valtar vinchel namak yah vyakti asadharan tezi se bat kar sakata tha. umr ho jane par bhi usaka dhunaadhar bolana jari raha, par kaee bar munh se kuchh ka kuchh nikal jaya karata tha.
halanki hamara sho chala nahin. vyaktigat roop se main logon ka dhyan khinchane men safal raha. verayati ke sim silvar main ne mere bare men kaha,"mandali men kam se kam ek mazedar angrez tha, aur vo amerika men chalega."
ab tak ham log boriya-bistar samet kar chh: hafton ke bad ingalaind lautane ka man bana chuke the. par tisare saptah hamane apana natak fifth evenyoo thietar men khela. yahan jyadatar darshak angrej naukar aur khanasame the. somavar, pahali rat ko ham dhamake se chale. har chutakule par ve hanse. ham sabhi chakit the, main bhi, kyonki mainne bhi hamesha jaisi berukhi kee ummid kee thi. mujhe lagata hai, kamachalaoo pradarshan se mere oopar dabav nahin tha aur mainne koee galati nahin kee.
us saptah ek ejent ne ham logon se mulakat kee aur salivan end konsidain sarkit men bis hafton ke daure ke lie buk kar liya. ye chalataoo rangarang vividh sho karyakram tha, aur hamen din men tin sho karane the.
salivan konsidain ke us pahale daure men koee jabardast dhamaka to ham logon ne nahin kiya lekin auron ke mukabale bis hi rahe. un dinon midil vest lubhavana tha. utani bhag-daud nahin thi aur mahaul romantik tha. harek drag stor aur sailoon men ghusate hi chausar kee tebal hoti thi jahan har us chij ke lie pansa fenka ja sakata tha jo vahan bik rahi ho. ravivar kee subah men strit khadakhadate dais kee pyari aur dostana aavaz se bhari hoti thi. kaee bar main bhi das sent men ek dalar kee chizen jit jata.
jivan yapan sasta tha. ek hafte men sat dolar par kisi chhote hotal men ek kamara aur din men tin bar bhojan mil jata tha. khana bahut hi sasta tha. sailoon ka fri lanch kauntar hamari mandali ke lie bahut bada sanbal tha. ek nikal (panch sent) men ek gilas biyar aur khane kee sabase svadisht aur khas chizen mil jaya karati thin. sooar kee ranen hoti thin, slaisd haim, aaloo salad, sardin machhaliyan, maikaroni chiz, livar vurst, kulacha aur hot dog! hamare kuchh sadasy isaka fayada uthate aur apani pleton par tab tak dher lagate jate jab tak bar main tok n de,"oe, utana lad kar kahan chal die - kya klonadaik kee taraf?"
hamare dal men panâ€drah ya kuchh adhik log the. tren kee barth ke paise dene ke bad bhi har membar kam se kam apana aadha mehanatana bacha leta tha. meri tanakhvah thi ek hafte men pachahattar dolar aur isamen se pachas to shan se baink aof mainahatan men niyamit roop se pahunch jate.
daure ke silasile men ham log kost pahunche. rangarang karyakram kee usi tim men hamare sath pashchim kee taraf chalane valon men teksas ka ek sundar yuvak tha jo kasarati jhoole par karatab dikhata tha. vah ye tay nahin kar pa raha tha ki aur aage bhi apane partanar ke sath hi bana rahe ya eenami dangal lada kare. roj subah main boksing ke dastane pahan kar usake sath utarata. vah beshak mujhase lanba aur bhari tha, fir bhi main use jab jaise chahata, hit kar sakata tha. ham bahut achchhe dost ban gae aur boksing kee ek pari ke bad ham sath lanch lete. vo kaha karata tha ki usake aadami teksos ke sidhe sade kisan hain. vah farm kee zindagi ke bare men ghanton batiyata. jaldi hi ham log thietar ka dhandha chhodane aur sajhedari men sooar palane ke bare men bat karane lage.
ham donon ke pas kul milakar do hajar dolar the aur tha, dher sara paisa kamane ka ek sapana. hamane yojana banayi. arakasons men pachas sent prati ekad ke hisab se do hazar ekad jamin shuroo men li jae aur bakee paisa sooar kharidane men lagaya jae. hamane jod-jad kar dekha ki agar sab kuchh thik-thak chala to sooaron ke badhate chakravriddhi dhang se paida hone aur ausatan har sal panch ke hisab se bachche janane ke hisab se panch varshon men ham ek lakh dolar bana sakate hain.
relagadi men safar karate hue ham khidakee se bahar dekhate aur sooar badon ko dekhakar josh se bhar uthate. hamare khane, sone aur yahan tak ki sapane men bhi sooar hi sooar. sooar palane ke vaigyanik taur tarikon par mainne ek kitab n kharid li hoti to sho bijanes chhodakar sooar palak ban gaya hota. lekin us kitab ne, jisamen sooaron ko badhiya karane ke sachitr tarike die gae the, mera josh thanda kar diya aur jaldi hi main is dhandhe ko bhool gaya.
is daure par apane sath main vayalin aur selo lekar chala tha. solah baras kee umr se hi apane bedaroom men main har din char se chhah ghante inhen bajane ka abhyas kiya karata tha. har hafte main thietar sanchalak se ya jise vo kahata usase vayalin ke sabak leta tha. main baen hath se bajata tha isalie vayalin bhi baen hath ke hisab se bandha tha, jisamen bas-bar aur saunding post ulat die gae the. meri badi ichchha thi ki sangit samaroh ka kalakar banoonga ya ye nahin kar paya to rangarang karyakram men bajaoonga. lekin jaise-jaise samay bitata gaya, meri samajh men aa gaya ki isamen kabhi mahir nahin ho paoonga, so mainne ise chhod diya.
1910 ka shikago apani kuroopata, bhayavahata aur kalima men ek aakarshan lie hue tha. ek aisa shahar jisamen abhi bhi shuruaati dinon ke mijaj the. karl saindaling ke shabdon men dhoone aur ispat ka ek falata-foolata sahasi mahanagar. mujhe isake charon or faile samatal maidan roos ke ghas ke maidanon jaise lagate hain. kuchh naya karane ka isamen prachand ullas tha jo tan-man ko anupranit karata tha. lekin isake bhitar ek paurushi ekakeepan dhadakata tha. is jismani bimari ke kat ke roop men maujood tha ek rashtriy manoranjan jise barlesk sho (prahasana/pairodi) kaha jata tha. isamen beharatin komediyanon ka ek gut hota tha aur sath men bis ya kuchh adhik koras ladakiyan hoti thin. kuchh sundar, kuchh ghisi-piti. kamediyan mazedar the. jyadatar sho ashlil hote the, jananakhane kee komedi ghatiya aur buraiyon se bhari huee. poora mahaul hi main ka tha. kshudr kam pratidvandvita se bhara huaa jo dekhane valon ko ulte kisi bhi prakar kee samany kamechchha se alag kar deta tha. jhooth-mooth kee bhavukata dikhana hi unakee pratikriya hoti. aise sho shikago men bhare pade the. vatsans bif trast namak aise hi ek sho men adhed umr kee bhari-bharakam auraten chust kapadon men pradarshan karati thin. is bat ka prachar kiya jata tha ki un sabhi ka vajan tanon men hai. thietar ke bahar sharmaye, sakuchae poz men unakee tasviren badi du:khad aur nirashajanak hoti thin.
shikago men ham vabash evenyoo men ek chhote hotal men rahate the. jirnn-shirn aur manahoos hone ke bavajood isamen ek romani aakarshan tha kyonki barlesk kee adhikansh ladakiyan vahan rahati thin. har shahar men ham us hotal ke bahar madhumakkhiyon kee tarah lain laga dete jahan sho vali ladakiyan thaharati thin. par jis chakkar men jaya karate the usamen kamayab nahin hue. oonchaee par chalane vali trenen rat ko tezi se nikalatin aur rah-rah kar purane baiskop kee tarah mere sone ke kamare kee dival ko jhilamila jatin. fir bhi, mujhe is hotal se pyar tha, halanki kabhi kuchh romani ghatit huaa nahin.
ek javan ladakee, shant aur sundar, kisi karan se hamesha akeli rahati thi, use chalate dekhakar lagata, jaise apane prati behad sachet hai. hotal kee lobi men aate-jate usake pas se hokar kaee bar guzara par itani himmat kabhi juta nahin paya ki parichay paoon. vaise ye to kahana hi padega ki apani taraf se usane kabhi patta nahin fenka.
shikago se kost ham jis tren men ja rahe the, vo ladakee bhi usi men thi. vest jane vali barlesk kanpaniyan aam taur par hamare hi raste hokar jatin. aur unaka karyakram bhi ek hi shahar men padata. gadi men mainne use apani kanpani ke ek sadasy se bat karate dekha. bad men vah mere pas aakar baitha.
mainne poochha, "kaisi ladakee hai vo?"
"badi hi pyari. bechari, afasos hota hai usake lie!"
"kyon?"
vah jhukakar aur pas aa gaya,"yad hai, hava udi thi ki sho kee kisi ladakee ko sifalis hai? bas, yahi hai."
sital men use kanpani chhodane diya gaya. vah aspatal men bharti huee. hamane usake lie paise ikattha kie jisamen sari ghumantoo kanpaniyon ne yogadan diya. bechari ke bare men sabako pata tha. alabatta, vo sabakee shukragujar thi aur bad men sailavarasam kee suee, jo us samay abhi nayi dava thi, lekar thik huee. aur fir se apani kanpani men vapas aa gayi.
un dinon poore amerika men veshyavritti berok-tok fail rahi thi. shikago ka vishesh nam haus aof aol neshans ke chalate tha jise do adhed umr kee mahilaen, eevarali bahanen chalati thin. isakee khyati is bat men thi ki yahan har desh kee auraten upalabdh thin. kamaron ke farnichar bhi har stail ke the : turkee, japani, looi XVI, yahan tak kee arabi tanboo bhi. ye duniya ka sabase kharchila randi bazar tha. bade-bade lakhapati, udyogapati, kaibinet mantree, sinetar aur jaj, sabhi isake grahak the. aam taur par kisi ek paripati ke log poore randi bazar ko hi ek sham ke lie apane kabje men lene ka theka kar lete karate the. batate hain ki ek bahut bade aiyyash ne vahan aisa dera jamaya ki tin hafte tak usane din ka ujala bhi nahin dekha.
jitana hi ham pashchim kee taraf badhate gae, utana hi mujhe yah pasand aata gaya. tren ke bahar jangali zamin ke vishal failav ko dekhakar mere man men aasha ka sanchar hota, bhale hi jagah sunasan aur matamaili ho. khuli jagah rooh ke lie achchhi hoti hai. hriday ko vishal banati hai. mere dekhane ka nazariya bada hota tha.
kvivalaind sent lui, minnipolis, sent pol, kanasas siti, denavar, bat, bilings, jaise shaharon men aane vale kal kee halachal thi jo meri nas-nas ko tadaka rahi thi.
doosari rangarang karyakramon vali kanpaniyon se kaee sadasy hamare dost bane. har shahar men red lait ilakon men ham men se chh: ya us se adhik log ikatthe ho jate. kabhi-kabhi kisi veshyalay kee maidam ko ham log patane men kamayab ho jate. vo us rat ke lie "adda" band kar deti aur fir hamara raj hota. yada-kada ladakiyan abhinetaon par fida ho jatin aur agale shahar tak unaka pichha karatin.
batt, montana ke red-lait ilake lambi sadakon aur unase lage agal-bagal ke chhote raston vale huaa karate the jisamen saikadon jhopadiyan thin, aur khaten lagi hoti thin. inamen jo ladakiyan milati thin unakee umr solah sal se shuroo hoti thi - ek dolar men upalabdh. batt ko kisi bhi red lait ilake ke mukabale apane yahan jyada sundar ladakiyan hone ka naz tha aur ye sach tha bhi. jahan koee sundar-si ladakee aakarshak kapadon men dikhi, dekhane vala samajh jata tha ki red lait vali hai, apani shoping kar rahi hai. dhandhe ka taim n ho to vo daen-baen nahin jhankati thi aur izazatadar ho jati thin. kaee baras bad main somar set mom se unake sedi thamasan ke charitr ko lekar ulajh pada tha. jahan tak mujhe yad hai, jin eegals ne use spring said boot vagairah pahana kar poora oot-patang sa roop de diya tha. mainne unhen bataya, janab aise kapade batt montana men koee bhi dhandhe vali pahan le to ek adhela nahin kama paegi.
1910 men batt, montana abhi bhi "nik kartara" vala shahar tha. lambe-lambe boot aur das gailan vali topiyan aur lal gulooband lagae khan majadooron ka shahar. bandook ka khel mainne apani aankhon se sadakon pe dekha, jisamen ek boodha shairif bhagode kaidi ke pairon par nishana laga raha tha. takadir se vo bad men ek band gali men fans gaya, aur kuchh huaa nahin.
ham jaise jaise pashchim kee taraf badhate jate, mera dil utana hi khush hota jata. shahar jyada saf the. raste men vinipeg, tekoma, sital, vainkoovar aur portalaind padate the. vinipeg aur vainkoovar men jyadatar darshak angrej the aur apane amerikee jhukav ke bavajood unake samane abhinay karane men aanand aaya.
aur ant men keliforniya! khili dhoop, santare aur angoor ke bag, aur prashant mahasagar ke tat par hazaron mil tak faile tad ke vrikshon ka svarg! poorv ka pravesh dvar sain fransisko achchhe vyanjanon aur saste damon ka shahar, jisane mujhe pahali bar mendhak kee tang ka jayaka diya. khalis vahin kee chij, stroberi short kek aur evokedo nashapati.
ham 1910 men pahunche jab shahar 1906 vale bhookanp se, ya unake shabdon men kahen to aag se, ubar chuka tha. pahadi raston men abhi ek ya do dararen thin lekin nuksan ka koee avashesh nahin. har chiz nayi aur chamachamati huee thi. mera chhota hotal bhi.
hamara karyakram empres men tha. isake malik the sid graumain aur unake pita, bade hi milanasar aur samajik log. pahali bar postar par main akela tha aur karno ka nam tak nahin tha. darshak - kya khoob! "vaoo vaooza" niras tha kir bhi har sho khachakhach bhara aur thahakon se goonjata huaa hota. graumain ne utsahit hokar kaha,"karno sahab ka kam jab bhi nipat jay, mere pas aana, ham log milakar sho karenge." mere lie yah utsah janak bat thi. sain fransisko men ummid aur mehanat ke zajbe ko mahasoos kiya ja sakata tha.
doosari or los enjels, badasoorat shahar tha. garm aur kashtadayak. log mariyal aur kantihin lagate the. jalavayu jyada garm thi par sain fransisko vali tazagi nahin thi; prakriti ne uttari kailiforniya ko vo sanpadaen di hain jo vilsayar boleviyar vale pragaitihasik kolatar ke gaddhon men holivud ke gayab ho jane ke bad bhi falati-foolati rahengi.
mane apana pahala daura moramonsa[1] ke grih nagar salt lek siti men samapt kiya. main mozej aur izarael ke bachchon ke bare men sochane laga. shahar kafi faila aur khula huaa hai jo sooraj kee garmi men marichika kee tarah tharrata sa dikhata hai. sadakon kee chaudaee ka andaj vahi laga sakata hai jisane vishal maidanon ko par kiya ho. moramons kee hi tarah shahar akela aur kathor hai. dekhane vale bhi vaise hi the.
salivan end konsidain sarkit men "vau vau'ja" ke pradarshan ke bad ham nyoo yark vapas aa gae jahan se sidhe ingalaind lautane ka irada tha, lekin mistar viliyam moris, jo doosare rangarang traston se lad rahe the, ne ham logon ke poore dal ko nyoo yark shahar men fortithard strit par sthit apane thietar men chhah hafte ke karyakram ke lie buk kiya. hamane e nait in en inglish myoozik hol se shuruaat kee. isamen bhari safalata mili.
saptah ke dauran ek yuvak aur usake dost ladakiyon se mulakat hone tak ka samay katane ke lie idhar udhar dolate hue viliyam moris ke amerikan myoojik hol men ghus gae. yahan, un logon ne hamara sho dekha. unamen se ek ne kaha, "main kabhi bada bana to ek aadami hai jise apane lie loonga." vo "e nait in en inglish myoolik hola" kee bat kar raha tha. us samay vah ji dabloo graifith ke lie prati din panch dolar par bayograf kanpani men film ke ekstra ke roop men kary kar raha tha. vah vyakti tha, maik senet jisane bad men keeston kanpani banayi.
nyoo yark men viliyam moris ke lie chh: saptah ka safal karyakram karane ke bad ek bar fir salivan end kansidain sarkit ke lie bis hafton ke daure ke lie hamari buking ho gayi.
doosara daura samapti ke karib aane laga to main udas ho utha. tin hi saptah rah gae the: sain fransisko, sain diego, solt lek siti aur usake bad vapis ingalaind.
sain fransisko se ravana hone ke ek din pahale market strit par tahalate hue mainne ek chhoti si dukan dekhi jisamen parde vali khidakiyan thin. likha tha, "hath aur patte dekh kar aapakee takadir batayi jati hai - ek dalar." main andar gaya, jara jhenpata huaa. mera samana bhitar ke kamare se nikalati huee lagabhag bayalis sal kee ek sundar aurat se huaa. vah bhojan ke bich men hi uth kar aa gaee thi. khana chabate hue usane laparavahi se ek chhoti tebal kee or ishara kiya jisamen divar kee or pith aur daravaje kee or mukh padata tha. meri or dekhe bina usane kaha,"baith jaiye," aur doosari taraf khud baithi. usake taur tarike bade bedhange the. "patton ko idhar udhar karo, aur tin bar meri taraf kato aur tebal par apani khuli hatheli rakho." usane patte ulate, samane failaya aur unaka adhyayan kiya. fir mere hath dekhe. "lanbi yatra ke bare men soch rahe ho, yani stets chhod doge. par jald hi vapas lautoge aur ek naya dhandha shuroo karoge - jo abhi kar rahe ho usase kuchh alag." isake bad vah kuchh hichakichaee aur bhram men pad gayi, "lagabhag vaisa hi, lekin antar hai. is nae karobar men mujhe bhari safalata dikhaee de rahi hai. tumhare samane jabardast kairiyar pada huaa hai. par mujhe nahin pata kya hai?" pahali bar usane nazaren oopar keen. fir mera hath liya, "are, han, tin shadiyan hain: pahali donon nahin chalengi, lekin ant men tin bachchon ke sath sukhi vivahit jivan bitate hue aapakee zindagi kategi." (yahan vo galat thi!). isake bad fir se usane mera hath dekha,"han, paisa bahut jyada kamaoge; kamane vala hath hai." fir usane mera chehara dekha,"shvas nali ke nyoomoniya se maroge, bayasi sal kee umr men. ek dolar, pliz. aur kuchh poochhana chahoge?"
"nahin," mai hansa, "mujhe lagata hai, main akela achchha khasa jaoonga."
salt lek siti men samachar patr apaharan aur baink dakaitiyon se bhare rahate the. nait klabon aur kaife ke grahakon ko katar men divar kee tarak munh kie hue khada karava kar nakabaposh lutere loot lete the. ek hi rat men dakaiti kee tin ghatanaen ho gayi thin aur poore shahar men aatank fail gaya tha.
sho ke bad ham pine ke lie pas ke kisi sailoon men chale jate the, aur yada-kada grahakon se parichay ho jaya karata tha. ek sham ek mota, khush-mijaz, gol chehare vala aadami do aur logon ke sath aaya. unamen se umr men sabase bada, vo mota aadami aage aaya, "us angrezi natak men tumhin log samragyee kee bhoomika kar rahe ho?"
ham logon ne muskara kar sir hilaya,"tabhi to kahoon mainne tum logon ko pahachan liya! are! aao aao!" usane apane sath aae un logon ko bulaya aur unase parichay kara kar hamen drink aokar kiye.
mota angrez tha - vaise vo uchcharan ab nam matr ko rah gaya tha - lagabhag pachas ka, achchhe svabhav ka, chhoti chamakati aankhon aur lal surkh chehare vala aadami.
rat jaise-jaise bitati gayi, usake donon dost aur mere sath ke log bar kee or chale gae. main "motoo" ke sath akela rah gaya. usake dost use yahi kahakar pukarate the.
vah hamaraz ho gaya. "us purane desh men tin sal pahale main gaya tha." usane kaha,"lekin ye vaisa nahin hai - yahi to jagah hai. yahan tis sal pahale aaya. kuchh nahin tha. bas, ek anadi montana kopar men ssalon mehanat karate-karate chootad ghis jati thi. fir dimag lagaya. main kahata hoon yahi to khel hai, ab apane pas mustande hain. kam karane ko. usane noton kee moti gaddi bahar nikali."
"chalo ek aur draink lete hain," "bach ke!" mainne mazak men kaha, "pakade ja sakate ho!"
usane mujhe badi shaitani, aur janakar muskurahat se dekha fir aankh mar kar kaha, "ye nahin bachchoo!"
jis dhang se usane aankh mari, main andar tak saham gaya. isaka matalab bahut bada tha. vaise hi muskarate hue aur mujh par apani nazaren usi tarah tikae vah bolata gaya,"samajh rahe ho?" usane kaha. mainne samajhadari se sir hilaya.
isake bad goodh bhav se apana chehara mere kan ke pas lakar usane bat shuroo kee,"un do patthon ko dekh rahe ho?" vah apane mitron ke bare men fusafusaya,"vahi apana lashkar hai, do ulloo ke paththe, dimag jara bhi nahin, lekin jigar faulad ka."
mainne savadhani se apane hothon par ungali rakhi ki log sun lenge, vo aahista bole.
"thik hai, bhaeejan, ham log aaj rat jahaj se nikal rahe hain." usane aage kaha, "suno, ham to purane jahaji thahare, hai n? tumhen kaee bar ilingatan empayar men dekha hai jate aate." munh banakar usane kaha,"mushkil kam hai mere bhaee."
main hans pada.
aur gahara razadar banane ke bad usane mujhase taumr dosti karani chahi aur mera nyoo yark ka pata manga.
"bite dinon kee khatir kabhi do-ek lain tumhen likhoonga."
shukr hai fir usane kabhi sanpark nahin kiya.
…….
nau
amerika chhodate samay mujhe koee khas afasos nahin ho raha tha, kyonki mainne lautane ka man bana liya tha. kaise aur kab, main nahin janata tha. isake bavajood, mera man abhi se landan aur apane chhote-se sukoon bhare ghar men lautane kee rah dekhane laga tha. jab se main amerika ke toor par tha, ye flait mere lie mandir jaisa ho gaya tha.
sidani ka samachar bahut dinon se nahin mila tha. apane aakhiri khat men usane likha tha ki nanaji flait men rah rahe the. lekin mere landan pahunchane par, sidani mujhe steshan par mila aur bataya ki usane shadi kar li hai, flait chhod diya hai aur briksatan rod par saje sajae ghar men rah raha hai. ye soch kar mujhe bada jhataka laga ki khushiyon se bhara vah chhota-sa svarg ab nahin raha jisane mujhe jivan jine ko ek arth diya tha, aur ghar par naj karana sikhaya tha --------. ab main beghar tha. briksatan rod par mainne pichhe kee or ek kamara liya. jagah itani manahoos thi ki mainne jitani jald ho sake, amerika lautane faisala kar liya. kisi khali slot mashin men sikka dalane par jaise kuchh nahin hota us rat landan meri vapasi par vaisa hi beparavah laga.
sidani ne choonki shadi kar li thi aur har sham kam par rahata, main usase kam hi mil pata tha; parantu ravivar ko ham man se milane gae. ye bahut hi hatash karane vala din tha kyoki man abhi bhi thik nahin huee thi. vah abhi-abhi bhajan keertan ke shoragul vale daur se hokar guzari thi aur use gaddedar divaron vale kamare men rakha gaya tha. nars hamen pahale hi takeed kar chukee thi. sidani ne use dekha, lekin main usase milane kee himmat n kar saka, isalie intazar karata raha. sidani vapis aaya to pareshan lag raha tha. usane bataya ki ilaj ke taur par man ko barfile, thande pani kee dhar se shok diya gaya tha aur usaka chehara bilkul nila pad gaya tha. is par ham logon ne use ek praivet sansthan men rakhane ka faisala kiya - kharch ab ham utha sakate the - so, ham use us jagah par le aae pagal khane men jahan ingalaind ke mahan komediyan svargiy dan lio bharti kiye gaye the.
har din main apane aapako pahale se kahin jyada begana aur jad se kata huaa mahasoos karata tha. meri samajh se agar main apane chhote se flait men lauta hota, to meri bhavanaen doosari hotin. tab svabhavik roop se udasi mujh par poori tarah se havi n ho pati. amerika se aane ke bad purana parichay, riti-rivaj aur ingalaind se mera rishta sabhi mere bhitar uthal-puthal macha rahe the. ingalaind kee garmi ka mausam apane sabase achchhe roop men tha jisake jod kee roomani aur suhavani chiz meri nazar men koee doosari nahin thi.
bos karno ne mujhe taigs aailaind ke apane haus bot par saptahant ke lie bulaya. kafi lamba chauda intazam tha. sabakuchh behad suvyavasthit. mahogani ke painal vale kamare aur mehamanon ke lie niji rajasi thath bath vale kamare. rat men bot ke charon or rangin battiyon ke manamohak bandanavar jagamaga uthe. garm aur sundar sham thi aur dinar ke bad apani kofi aur sigaret lekar oopar vale dek men jagamagati rangin roshaniyon ke niche jakar baithe gae. yahi vo ingalaind tha jo mujhe kisi bhi desh se vapas khinch sakata tha.
achanak kahin se ek banavati aavaj ne pagalon kee tarah chikhana shuroo kar diya; "are dekho, kya pyari bot hai meri, dekho! meri mast nav ko! aur kya roshani! ha! ha! ha!" aavaz mazak udane vali hansi men badal rahi thi. ham logon ne yah dekhane ke lie nazar daudayi ki kahan se yah dhara foot kar aa rahi hai. hamane khenevali nav men safed flenal ke kapade pahane ek aadami ko dekha jisake pichhe kee sit par ek aurat leti huee thi. poora drishy "pancha" patrika ke kisi kartoon chitr kee tarah tha. korno reling par jhuke aur zor se aavaz lagayi lekin usane apani pagalon jaisi hansi nahin rokee.
"ab ek hi chiz kee ja sakati hai," mainne kaha: "ham bhi vaise ashlil ban jaen jaisa vo hamen sochata hai." fir to mainne chun-chun kar aisi galiyan sunayi jo usake sath kee aurat ke jhenpane ke lie kafi thi. vo jhatapat khisak liya.
ye moorkh chilla-chillakar ruchi kee aalochana nahin kar raha tha, ye to ahankar bhara poorvagrah tha us chij ke khilaf jise vah nimn vargiy thath bath samajh raha tha. bakingham pailes ke samane vah kabhi attahas karate hue nahin chillaega ki dekho main kitane bade ghar men rahata hoon, ya rajyabhishek vale rath par nahin hansega. hamesha is tarah honevale vargikaran ka ingalaind men mujhe tikha anubhav mila. aisa lagata hai jaise is tarah ke angrej samajik taur par doosaron kee kamiyan badi jaldi hi mapane taulane lagate hain.
hamari amerikee mandali kam men lag gayi thi aur landan ke holon men ham logon ne chaudah saptah tak pradarshan kiya. sho thik chale, darshak bhi achchhe the lekin hamesha main yah sochata rahata ki kahin amerika vapis ja paoonga ya nahin. ingalaind se mujhe pyar tha, par mere lie vahan rahana asanbhav tha; apani prishthabhoomi ke chalate hamesha ye bat bechain kie rahati ki yahan rah kar main apani tuchchhata ke daladal men dhansata chala ja raha hoon. isalie stets ke agale toor ke lie hamare buk ho jane ka samachar pakar main bada khush huaa.
ravivar ko sidani aur main man se milane gae. usakee sehat pahale se behatar lagi aur sidani ke pradeshon kee taraf jane se pahale ham logon ne sath khana khaya. landan men apani aakhiri rat apani bhavanaon se joojhata huaa, udasi aur kadavahat lie hue main vest end men chahalakadami kar raha tha aur apane aap se kah raha tha, in galiyon ko aakhiri bar dekh raha hoon.
is bar ham olanpik par sekand klas men nyoo york hote hue pahunche. injan kee dhadakan dhimi pad gayi. usaka matalab tha ham apani niyati ke karib pahunch rahe hain. is bar stets aparichit nahin laga. mujhe laga main videshiyon ke bich videshi hoon, bakee sabase juda huaa.
nyoo york ko main jitana pasand karata tha, utani hi utsukata se main vest kee pratiksha kar raha tha jahan fir un logon se mulakat hogi jinhen ab main achchha dost samajhata tha : montana ke batt ke bar men kam karane vala aayarish, minepolis ka dostana mehamananavaz jamin jayadad vala lakhapati, sent pol kee sundar ladakee jisake sath mainne ek romantik saptah bitaya tha. solt lek siti ka skotish khadan malik, takoma ka mitravat dentist aur sen fransisko ka gromains parivar.
prashant ke tat par jane se pahale hamane "smalsa" ke ird gird karyakram kiye. shikago aur filadelfiya ke doorasth upanagaron aur fol rivar aur dyooluth jaise audyogik shaharon ke chhote (smal) thietaron men.
pahale kee tarah main akele rah raha tha lekin isake labh the, kyonki isase mujhe svadhyay ka mauka milata tha. jisaka sankalp mainne mahinon ke pahale kiya tha par poora nahin kar paya tha.
kuchh aise log hote hain jinamen kuchh janane samajhane kee prachand ichchha hoti hai. main bhi unhin men se ek tha. par mera uddeshy itana pavitr nahin tha. main janana chahata tha lekin mujhe gyan se prem nahin tha, mere lie yah jahilon ke prati duniya kee ghrina se bachane ke lie dhal thi. isalie jab mujhe samay milata tha, main sekend haind kitabon kee dukanon ke chakkar lagata tha.
filadelfiya men yoon hi ek bar mujhe rabart ingarasols kee kitab esez end lekchars ka ek sanskaran hath lag gaya. badi utsahajanak khoj thi yaha; usakee nastikata se mere is vishvas ko bal mila ki old testament kee bhayanak kroorata manavata ke lie sharmanak bat thi. fir mujhe imarsan mile. "self rilaensa" ("aatmanirbharata") par unaka lekh padh kar laga jaise mujhe svargiy janmasiddh adhikar saunp diya gaya ho. fir aae shapenahavar. mainne d varld ez vil end aaidiya ke tin khand kharide jise chalis salon se jab tab padhata raha hoon par kabhi bhi shuroo se ant tak nahin. valt vhitamain kee livs aof gras se mujhe chidh huee aur ye chaidh aaj tak barakarar hai. usamen pyar bhara hriday kuchh jyada hi umadata hai aur rashtriy rahasyavad kee ati hai. sho ke bich milane vale samay men apane dresing room men mainne tven, po, harthatan, irving aur haizalit ko bhi padhane ka aanand liya. doosare daure men shasâ€treey shiksha utani bhale hi n aatmasat kar paya hooon jitana main chahata tha, par jis karobar men main tha usake nichale star ke ubaoopan se mera parichay ho gaya tha.
ye saste rangarang sarkits bade hi manahoos aur nirashajanak the aur amerika men mere bhavishy kee aasha saptah ke har din tin aur kabhi tin aur kabhi char sho kee chakkee men pisane lagi. isakee tulana men ingalaind ka rangarang jagat svarg tha. kam se kam vahan saptah men chh: din hi kam karate the aur ek rat men do hi sho hote the. amerika men hamen yahi soch kar santosh kar lena padata tha ki paisa kuchh jyada bach raha hai.
lagatar panch mahinon tak "kadi" mehanat ke sath kam karane kee thakan se meri himmat javab de rahi thi. isalie filadelfiya men ek hafte ke aaram ka jab mauka mila to mainne ise saharsh svikar kiya. mujhe badalav chahie tha. doosara parivesh chahiye tha. apani pahachan khokar koee aur ban jane ke lie mauka chahiye tha. roz-roz kee is ghatiya darje kee rangarang prastuti se ukata gaya tha aur socha ek hafte jam kar aisha kee jay. kafi paise jama ho chuke the aur khoonte se ek bar jo chhoota, dil khol kar kharachane laga. aur kyon nahin? mainne itana jama karane ke lie foonk -foonk kar kharch kiya tha aur ye socha tha ki jab kam nahin hoga, us samay bhi sanbhal kar kharachana hai, to fir abhi kyoon nahin jara sa kharch kar liya jae?
mainne ek manhaga dresing gaun kharida aur ek shanadar sootakes kharida jisakee keemat pichahattar dalar padi. dukanadar to khushamad men bichh gaya; "sar, kahie to aapake ghar par pahuncha diya jaye?" usake in thode se shabdon ne mera sir ooncha kar diya, mujhe kuchh vishisht bana diya. ab nyooyark jaoonga aur is ghatiya rangarang karyakram ka aur isake poore astitâ€v ka chola apane par se utar fekoonga.
mainne hotal estor men ek kamara liya. ye hotal un dinon bada aalishan mana jata tha. mainne apana naya kot aur darbi top pahana, chhadi li aur han, sath men apana chhota sootakes bhi le liya. lobi kee tadak-bhadak aur vahan aate-jate logon ka vishvas dekh kar main kuchh dagamagaya. ghabadahat men hi desk par jakar nam darj karaya.
kamare ka kiraya 4.50 dalar pratidin. darate hue mainre poochha ki kiraya edavans men de doon. klark ne badi hi vinamrata aur dilasa bhare andaj men kaha, "are nahin, sar, aisi koee zaroorat nahin hai."
lobi kee chamak-damak aur shano-shaukat ke bich chalate hue meri bhavanaon ko kuchh kuchh hone laga aur kamare men pahunch kar man rone ko karane laga. kamare men main lagabhag ek ghante tak raha. batharoom men lage tarah-tarah ke aainon aur nalon ka muaayana kiya. isake thande aur garm pani ke nalon ko chalakar unaka khoob bahav dekha. nalakon aur favvaron kee badhiya kismen niharata raha. kitani behisab hoti hai vilasita aur kitani aashvast karati hai.
mainne snan kiya, balon men kanghee kee, naya bath rob pahana. mera irada tha apane char dolar pachas sent kee paee paee ko bhogana. kash, mere pas padhane ko kuchh hota - akhabar hi sahi. lekin akhabar mangane ke lie fon karane ka aatmavishvas nahin tha. so, kamare ke bich men ek kursi par baithakar atyant udas man se har chij ko niharane laga. jitana dekhata, utana hi du:khi hota jata.
kuchh der bad mainne kapade pahane aur niche utara. mukhy bhojan kaksh ka rasta poochha. abhi dinar ka samay nahin huaa tha. jagah khali-khali thi. bas, do ek khane vale pahunche the. hed vetar mujhe khidakee ke pas vali ek tebal kee or le gaya.
"sar, aap yahan baithana pasand karenge?"
"kahin bhi chalega," mainne apani sabase umda angreji aavaz men kaha.
agale hi pal vetaron kee fauj ne mujhe gher liya aur thanda pani, menyoo, makkhan aur bred pesh karane lage. bhavukata men meri bhookh gayab ho chukee thi. alabatta, mainne isharon se kam liya aur shoraba, rost kiya huaa chiken aur mithi chij ke taur par vanila aaisakrim ka aordar diya. sharabon ka ek menyoo vetar ne mujhe diya. mainne dhyan se dekhane ke bad aadhi botal shaimpen mangayi. main raees kee bhoomika men itana dooba huaa tha ki bhojan aur sharab ka maza kya hi leta. kha pi lene ke bad mainne vetar ko ek dolar ka tip diya jo un dinon ke hisab se asadharan roop se jyada tha. lekin bahar jate vakt jo adab aur aadab mujh par barasaye gaye, itani tip deni banati thi. akaran hi, main vapas apane kamare men gaya, das minat tak baitha, fir hath dhoye aur bahar nikal pada.
chupachap mulayam garmi kee sham thi. mere mood kee tarah. main metropolitan opera haus kee or ja raha tha. vahan "tainhouzara" chal raha tha. mainne kabhi bhi graind opera nahin dekha tha. isake kuchh ansh rangarang karyakramon men dekhe the aur mujhe bhayankar chidh thi isase. par abhi main isake mood men tha. mainne ek tikat kharida aur sekend sarkil men baitha. opera jarman men tha, jisaka ek bhi shabd apane palle nahin pada aur n hi mujhe isakee kahani maloom thi. lekin rani ke marane ke bad use tirth yatriyon ke samoohik gan ke sangit ke sath laya gaya to main foot-foot kar ro pada. isamen meri jindagi ka sara dard simat aaya lagata tha. main apane aapako rok nahin paya. mere aas pas baithe logon ne kya socha hoga, mujhe nahin pata, lekin bahar nikala to badan men takat nahin rah gaee thi aur bhavanatmak roop se choor-choor ho gaya tha.
sabase andhere raston se hokar main shahar kee or chalane laga kyonki brodave kee ghoorati roshani mujhase bardasht nahin ho rahi thi aur mood thik hone tak main hotal vale us vahiyat kamare men lautana bhi nahin chahata tha. thik hone par mera sidha so jane ka irada tha. sharirik aur manasik roop se main nidhal ho chuka tha.
hotal men ghusane ke pahale main achanak hetti ke bhaee aarthar keli se takara gaya. hetti jis mandali men thi usaka vah mainejar tha. usaka bhaee hone ke nate ham logon men dosti thi. aarthar ko mainne kaee barason se nahin dekha tha.
"charli! kahan ja rahe ho?" usane kaha. maine laparavahi se estar kee disha men sir hilaya, "sone ja raha tha."
aarthar par isaka asar pada.
usake sath do dost the. unase mera parichay karane ke bad usane prastav rakha ki ham sabhi medisan evenyoo sthit usake ghar chalen, kofi pi jay aur gapashap ho.
flait aaramadayak tha. ham logon ne sath baith kar halkee fulkee idhar-udhar kee baten keen. aarthar is bat ke prati satark tha ki hamare atit ka koee jikr n aane pae. vaise, mere estar men thaharane kee bat sunakar vah aur janane ko utsuk tha. lekin mainne kuchh khas bataya nahin. sirf ye ki main do ya tin dinon kee chhutati men nyooyork aaya tha.
kenbaravail men jab aarthar rah raha tha tab se ab tak usane lamba safar tay kar liya tha. ab vah amir vâ€yavasayi ban gaya tha aur apane jija frenk je gold ke lie kam karata tha. usakee duniyavi baten sun kar main aur udas hota gaya. apane doston men se ek kee or ishara karate hue keli ne kaha, "achchha ladaka hai vah. achchhe parivar ka hai, meri janakari men." khanadan ke bare men usakee ruchi dekhakar main apane aap par muskuraya aur samajh gaya ki aarthar aur mera mel nahin tha.
nyoo yark men main keval ek din ruka. agali subah mainne filadelfiya lautane ka faisala kiya. us ek din men mujhe jo badalav chahie tha, vah mila par ye bhavanatmak akelepan ka tha. mujhe ab sang-sath chahie tha. mujhe somavar subah vale karyakram aur mandali ke logon se milane ka intazar tha. purane kolhoo men jutana kitana bhi ubaoo ho, us ek din ke that-bat se mera ji bhar gaya tha.
filadelfiya laut kar main thietar gaya. rivz sahab ke nam ek tar aaya tha aur unhonne jab use khola, main vahin tha.
"mujhe lagata hai kahin tumhare lie to nahin," unhonne kaha.
likha tha "aapakee kanpani men chaiqin ya vaise hi nam ka koee vyakti hai. yadi ho to vah kaisel end bavamain, 24 longakeyar bilding brodave se sanpark kare."
kanpani men us nam ka koee nahin tha, lekin rivz ka manana tha ki us nam ka matalab chaiplin ho sakata hai. fir to main aanandit ho utha kyonki mujhe, jaisa ki pata chala, longakeyar bilding brodave ke bichon-bich padati thi aur isamen vakeelon ke daftar bhare pade the; ye yad karake ki stets men kahin meri ek amir chachi huaa karati thi, meri kalpana ko pankh lag gae; guzarane se pahale vo zaroor achchha-khasa paisa chhod gayi hogi. so mainne jhatapat kesal end bavamain ko tar diya ki kanpani men chaiplin namak ek vyakti hai aur ve shayad usi ke bare men bat kar rahe hain. main utsukata se javab kee pratiksha karane laga. usi din javab mila. mainne jhat se tar fada aur kholakar padha.
likha tha: "kya aap chaiplin ko jald se jald daftar men milane ko kah sakate hain."
utsahit hokar badi aasha se mainne nyoo yark ke lie ekadam subah kee gadi pakadi. filadelfiya se dhaee ghante ka rasta tha. kya hoga mujhe nahin pata tha - mainne kalpana kee ki kisi vakeel ke daftar men baitha hoon aur mujhe koee vasiyat padhakar sunayi ja rahi hai.
pahunchane par kuchh nirasha huee kyonki kesal end bavamain vakeel nahin the, chalachitr nirmata the. alabatta, ye mamala romanchak hone ja raha tha.
charls kesal keeston kanpani ke malikon men se ek the. unhonne kaha ki mistar maik senet ne mujhe forti sekend strit vale amerikee myoozik hol men piyakkad kee bhoomika men dekha tha aur yadi main vahi aadami hoon to vo mujhe ford starling kee jagah rakhana chahenge. mere man men kaee bar filmon men kam karane ka khyal aaya tha, aur apane mainejar rivz ke samane mainne prastav bhi rakha tha ki ham log milakar sajhedari men karno ke skechej ke sarvadhikar kharid len aur unakee filmen banaen. lekin rivz ko poora bharosa nahin tha, aur bat sahi bhi thi, kyonki ham filmon banane ke bare men kuchh janate nahin the.
"kya mainne keeston kee koee komedi dekhi hai?" kesal sahab ne poochha. dekhi to mainne kaee thi, lekin mainne ye nahin bataya ki mujhe vo kahin ka eent kahin ka roda jod ke banayi lagati thi. alabatta, mabel narmed namak khoobasoorat ladakee, jo bich bich men un filmon men aati jati rahati thi, kee maujoodagi ke karan ve ab tak tike hue the. keeston dharre kee komedi ko lekar main kuchh khas utsahit nahin tha, lekin mujhe isakee lokapriyata ka bhan tha.
is lain men ek sal bitakar rangarang karyakramon kee duniya men lautane par main antarrashtriy sitara ban jaoonga. isake alava, isamen ek nayi zindagi aur achchha mahaul bhi tha. kaisal ka kahana tha ki karar ke anusar mujhe prati saptah tin filmon men kam karana hoga aur vetan hoga dedh sau dalar. karno kee kanpani se jitana milata tha, usase yah duguna tha. fir bhi mainne na nukur karate hue kaha ki prati saptah do sau dolar se kam nahin loonga. kaisal sahab ne kaha ab ye senet sahab par hai; vo unhen keliforniya men bata denge. fir mujhe soochana mil jaegi.
kaisal ke javab ka intazar mainne badi bechaini se kiya. shayad main bahut jyada mang baitha tha. aakhirakar khat aaya ki ve log pahale tin mahinon ke lie dedh sau dolar aur bakee ke nau mahinon ke lie ek sau pachahattar dolar - jindagi men ab tak isase bada aofar nahin mila tha - ke hisab se sal bhar ke karar ke lie taiyar the. salivan end kansidain toor ke samapt hote hi kam shuroo hona tha.
eeshvar kee kripa se los enjels men ham log empres men khoob chale the. yah ek komedi thi. nam tha "e nait et d klaba". main ek kamazor boodhe piyakkad kee bhoomika men tha aur dikhane men kam se kam pachas baras ka lag raha tha. natak samapt hone par senet sahab khush hokar mujhe badhaee dene aae the. us chhoti-si mulakat men mera sabaka ghani bhaunh, bhari anakarshak munh, aur majaboot jabade vale ek bhari-bharakam insan se pada tha aur is chehare mohare se main prabhavit huaa. par main is udhedabun men tha ki apane bhavishy ke rishte men vah kitani sahridayata se pesh aaenge. us sakshatkar men lagatar main behad narvas tha aur samajh nahin pa raha tha ki banda mujhase khush hai ya nahin.
main kab unhen jvain karoonga, unhonne chalataoo dhang se poochha. maine bataya sitanbar ke pahale hafte men shuroo karoonga, jab karno kanpani se mera karar khatm ho raha hai. kansas siti chhodane ko lekar mere man men kuchh khataka tha. kanpani vapas inglaind ja rahi thi aur main los enjels, jahan main akela hooonga aur bat kuchh jam nahin rahi thi. antim karyakram ke pahale mainne sabake lie drink mangaya aur sabase vida lene ke vichar se main kuchh gamagin ho gaya.
apani mandali ke aarthar dendo, jisakee mujhase kisi karan vash patati nahin thi, ko mazak soojha aur mujhe kuchh upahasatmak dhang se kasamasa kar bataya ki kanpani kee or mujhe tohafa milega. ye kabool karata hoon ki ye bat mere dil ko chhoo gayi thi. alabatta, kuchh huaa nahin. dresing room se jab sab ja chuke the, fred karno jooniyar ne svikar kiya ki daindo ne vastav men ek vidaee bhashan taiyar kiya tha aur mujhe ek bhent dene kee vyavastha kee thi, lekin ye dekhakar ki mainne sabake lie pine ka intajam kiya hai, usakee vo sab karane kee himmat nahin huee aur vah tathakathit "upahara" dresing tebal ke aaine ke pichhe chhod gaya tha. tin kee panni men lipati huee tanbakoo kee khali dibiya thi jisamen chikanaee vale rogan kee purani khurachan rakhi huee thi.
§ karna trup men ham sahi tarike se tempo par maharat hasil kar saken, isamen ek sath kam karane men hamen chh: mahine lag jaya karate the tab tak hamen kraich kraud kaha jata tha.
……
(kramashah agale ankon men jari…)
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tag : charlie chaplin, autobiography of charlie chaplin in Hindi, hindi translation of charlie chaplin’s autobiography, suraj prakash
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